Commander Portsmith's Newsletter
2007-06-18
There has been an ongoing debate about some positions in the administration, and it has come to my knowledge that some citizens have even dared to mention a very outdated practice abolished in Deppville for just and good reasons. That abominable old fashioned method is called voting. A totally useless overrated waste of time.
Let me explain this to you closer. Voting means that those registered as voters can give their opinion on a matter simply by giving his or her vote, usually to one in a limited choise of candidates. And as we all know, such opinions are rarely based on facts and logical thinking and that is why it inevitably leads to very unfortunate results. For one, the candidates who get most votes are either bribing the public, which makes them highly suspicious administrators. A person who bribes once, will do it again. Would you really want to be lead by someone who can be bought by the highest bidder? Second, the other type of candidates who may be chosen are the spineless ones who will do anything to please everyone. Lost of promises and no intention to keep them. Thus, voting is bad for morals.
A good leader is independent and just, and does not have to count on the ever-shifting public opinion in the choised she or he makes. A good leader does not have to run every time a hard decision has to be made to the nearest citizen to ask for a solution. No, a good leader is there to take this terrible burden from the ordinary citizen so that she can sleep her nights in peace.
Continuity is also vital in keeping the peace. With me - or any other leader who does not have to compete about voters' souls - the citizens know that there will be no drastic changes in the way the city is run. The highest goal in my work is to guard the town against pirates and other vile creatures threatening the peace and harmony of our little conmmunity.
Let me also remind you of the importance of monuments. The Equesterian Statue of Commander Portsmith, donated to the town by the thankful citizens, is a reminder for all of us that great statesmanship can't be achieved by short term work positions. Leadership is inborn in some people. Therefore, as a conclusion, there will be no voting because it is totally unnecessary. There is no other choice than me to run this city, and as everybody knows it, voting would only confirm what we all know. Though I am humble by nature, I have decided to take this offer and accept the statue. I am very moved when I am writing these last lines. The people of Deppville have spoken. It is soon time for the Great Unveiling Ceremony. Thank you for you attention, and may I point out, that it would, of course, be more in style if the mane of the horse could be guilded.
2007-01-14
This newsletter deals with the most important we have: our children. Everybody knows how children are one of the main concerns of my life. I have been giving much thought of how to improve the conditions of our youngest citizens. Let's face the fact that all parents are obviously not up to their duties, and therefore can cause great harm to a child's mind. Many parents are clueless about bringing up their children, and we know that without proper guidance and discipline children turn into thieves and pirates.
We have to fight piracy in its infancy, so to say. We have to guard our children from harmful influences and give them instead some goals to strive to. This is exactly what I am doing with Portsmith's Youth Association
Parents! You can apply for the membership of the Youth Association for your children. I am personally watching over their education and upbringing and those who do well can look up to a stipendium from the PYA Fond. Do you want your child to enter a good university and become a venerable industrious citizen, or do you want to see him hoisting the black flag, threatening proper citizens, looting, plundering, spitting and drinking rum? Let us all say NO to piracy! Join the Association to fight the pest of piracy!
Parents of newborn babies are encouraged to join the new Portsmith Godmother Program. Every new godchild gets a special numbered medal. Be quick, because the membership is limited, because I want to direct proper attention to every baby. So far there are three godchildren: Sam and Lola deMarco and Chiana Abberline. Be the first to join them! You would not want your child to miss this great opportunity.
Citizens without children are welcome to donate to the Fund. No small coins are accepted.
2006-12-02
Some guidelines for celebrating Christmas in Deppville. As Christmas is known as a festival of peace and goodwill, we, the Administration, have prepared a code of conduct during the Christmas time. All ill feelings are to be set aside. There will be no fighting. No street brawls. And no thieving. The dungeons will be closed till the 1st of January. But anybody who violates these rules, will find that they can be opened for a special private tour. Christmas is a solemn feast and it should be celebrated accordingly. Let us remember our best traditions, our great cultural heritage of enlightenment and civilization.
The Administration has prepared an Official Deppville Advent Calendar for our citizens. Everyone is required to open a door daily. Not doing this is counted as an offence to Deppville and our Mayor. Knowing that all there are a lot of pirates and thieves, we have seen it unavoidable to install a security system in the Calendar to stop cheating. It is very sad that people can't be trusted. Keep in mind that I every click is registered, which enables me to see who of you have fulfilled their duty. The costs of the Calendar will be collected immediately in taxes. As we all understand these kind of projects don't come cheap. There is also a set of greeting cards in the Gallery. The Deppville Christmas eCards found in the Gallery should be used to send Christmas Greetings to friends and relatives by our citizens. I will closely be following the statistics here as well. Both services and be accessed on the Christmas Page.
The Chapel of St. John the Baptist will be open daily under the festive season. The entrance fee is one Deppville dollar, which is very cheap indeed considering that visitors can see our unique relic: The skull of John the Baptist at the age of twelve.
One more word of caution. There seems to be some very strong ghost tranquillizer on the black market. Let me remind you that using ghost tranquillizer is strictly forbidden. The Security has also confiscated loads of illegal shirts with Stealers logo printed on them. Citizens are advised not to wear these shirts. Any pirates caught in action smuggling any goods will be hanged immediately. Thank you for your attention.
2006-11-13
This is the first Portsmith Newsletter. It has become very obvious that both the citizens of Deppville and our random visitors need more guidelines and information. This newsletter is created to enlighten the populace and remind us all about the importance of obeying the laws. Rules are broken and disregarded on a daily basis, and I have to remind you that Deppville is not a dirty pirate den where all kinds of despicale vices are practiced. Let us keep our little town clean and civilized and follow the rules to keep our town a pleasant place to live in even in the future.
To maintain peace and order, any pirates misbehaving and stray vampires are to be immediately reported to the Security Office. All broken surveillance cameras will be replaced. It has come to my knowledge that there has been a fight at Club Badonkadonk over some stripper wear. Strippers are forbidden to throw their clothes into the audience, and if any more trouble arises at the Club, it will be closed down for an indefinite time.
There has been several offences to the property of Chateau Blanchefort. Trespassing and trampling of the meadows has occurred frequently. These carefully crafted natural meadows planned by our landscape artist Seth and Sheldon the florist, are very vulnerable and every trespasser leaves distinct traces in the precarious ecosystem of the meadows. Nature has to be respected as well as private property. This kind of barbary and carelessness amaze me every time. Measures will be taken against any trespassers to protect the meadows.
Let us all welcome our new citizen, Miss Sarah Moon. She has opened a bookstore, Sarah's Books, at the center. I want to remind you that she does not sell any immoral magazines. I recommend every citizen to aquint themselves with this bookstore. At least all of those who are literate. As a welcome gift, Deppville authorities have decided to give her a poster with the Ten Commandments and a painting of the Mayor.
he New Official Deppville site maintained by Deppville Administration has opened. The site can be seen at http://www.deppville.net. I strongly suggest you to read first the Official Pages as a reminder for us all what our town is about. I can't stress enough the importance of the Ten Commandments.
On behalf of the Administration of Deppville
Commander M. Portsmith,
Head of Security
